BREAKS MY HEART

Keep It On The Low
So Nobody Know
So We Can Focus On Us
Baby It's You I Trust
But I'm Loosing Faith
Showed You That Love
Hope You Still Feel The Same
I Know You're Young
I'm Younger So What Can We Do
I've Mainly Been With
Dudes A Lot Older Than You
Have Me Feelin' My Young Ways Again
I Don't Wanna Get Caught Up
I'm Thinkin' It's Already Too Late
The Way I Feel About You
No Body Could Take That Away
I Mean You Already Crushed My Heart
My Hearts A Little Cold
Sometimes It Can't Feel Shit
But It Could Feel You
It Felt You
Back & Forth
Over & Over Again
How Could You Put Me In This Position
I Respected You
I Thought You'd Listen
Did I Have Too Much Faith ?
Never That
I Have Even More Faith
More Belief
That One Day You'll See
You're The One For Me
& I'll Wait For You
But While You're Fuckin' Around
If He Comes He Comes
& If The "He" Is You
Then What Are You Running From
I'm Right Here, I'm Right Here
You Must Think I'm Strong Enough
To Get My Heart Broken Again
The Fuck You Think You Are
Don't Be Just Another
I Never Thought You Would Be
Just Another - Breaks My Heart
I Might Have Asked Him
To Put Me Through It
Subliminally Prove It
But What I Had In Mind
You Ain't Even Do It'
Ain't Close To Startin'
Said You Ain't Ready
Visually - You Seem
Pretty Damn Ready
So Do What You Want
I Know What I Want For My Life...
Breaks My Heart.

Friends ?

I know it sounds good
You could be living better
Have that dude you always wanted
Dress you up in fur and leather
But its all just a day dream
Hour after hour, another hour away
Another hour closer, another night closer
Another stack to save
But you young
And not thinking twice
So you spend it
Cause your friend, she act nice
Expensive dinners and name brand stores
A couple pair of underwear here and there
J'adore Juicy Couture
& The pussy purrs
But who do you want it
To purr for
What do you want
Out of life
How do you want to be sleeping
At the end of every night
Who are your friends
And what are their aspirations
What do they like to do day to day
And how do they treat you
Do they have respect
Or do they beat you
And tear you down with
Their bullshit
Tell me
Are you just used to it
Or do you know its wrong
But hold on
There's a motive
Always a motive
Gotta pay the rent
So much time spent
Oh wait, fuck that
What you even doing it for
Basically no bills
I'm sure you get thrills
But you haven't met him yet
& If you did would you want
Him to know you like this ?
Would you want to expose yourself
Wouldn't you want him to
See you as you should be seen
Before the recklessness
Before the misguided daydreams
I tried to tell you
And I'll keep telling you
Again and again
Why, why the fuck ? you ask me
Cause' ... Cause' your my friend.

Girl...

This is really real
Are you ready to deal
Tyna' help you
But sometimes I encourage
This friendship
Means a lot to me
& You're my girl
I don't wanna fuck you up more
But you're already there
& I'm the one who cares
So listen to me when I say
Sometimes the easy way is not the way
& How easy is it really
Taking a toll on your body and mind
Girl take some time
Think where you wanna be
& If you're livin' right...

Taking Time:

I couldn't ask for anything more perfect
I truly feel in my heart, this time I deserve it
I deserve to feel your love at it's finest, yeah
You went and did it now I'm thinking about what we have
I wanna let you know
I know you ain't ready
But my heart feels heavy
It's ready to pour out my love for you
But if you want to sip slowly
I'll let you take your time
Promise you'll think of me
Cause' I think of you
From rhyme to rhyme
I'm wondering how you feel
Anytime you ready baby..
I could be yours
You could be mine...

Right Now...

Feed On That Seed

Stressin' yourself
Drinking and smoking
You didn't use to smoke
& When you I'm not around
I know you choking
I swear you floating
Unable to grasp reality
Like how you livin' like that for
How many drinks you gonna let him pour
Girl what you even doing there
Girl I swear you don't even care
You claim it's all good
Unaware of the dangerous life you living
You see others living it content
But you don't know how much time they put in
How much time they spent
How many sacrifices they made
How much of themselves they had to change
Without even knowing most of them
Adapt to the game and I know you the same
But you just ain't livin' right
& I know it's new to you
But these days it ain't new
So what am I to do
Truly confused
How to save a friend in need
Who thinks she's all good
Why can't she see
Probably gettin' talks
From nothing but birds
How can I show her
I'm all out of words
If you know someone the same
Then I guess you know that
Miniature pain
Have you feelin' ashamed
For not doing something
Feelin' like you don't know
If it lies on you or not
To set them straight
& Let them know whats good
Show them the good things in life
& How we should
Be living
Loving
Giving
Trusting
Feeling
Thinking
Doing
Etcetera
I guess for now
I'll just let her
Notice how the birds flock
But ME
I'm not tryna feed on that seed.

Rule

It should be illegal to express these feelings
Cause I feel like everyone steal em'
But that's just the darkness speaking
We're all feeling like this for a reason
It takes time to heal and you know whats real
Tellin' him how you feel inside
Even if you feel like you should just cry
Cause you ain't ever felt like this before
Feel like hittin' the floor
It's you I adore
& I told you before
Whats the word
Whats really good
How you feelin
I was thinkin you could
Come and be the one
The one for me
Cause I feel you already are
Just had to let my feelings out
I hope you ain't upset
Cause you're the one I love
So don't you forget
Yeah, and as I slept
I swear I dreamed of you a couple times
& When I woke up you were on my mind
So whats a girl to do
Feeling nothing but cool
Come on boy, let's Rule

Holla

Something so perfect
Yet we all make mistakes
Wishing to go back
How much strength does it take
To move on and be happy
Just let it all go
All of the love formed in the past
The touches, embraces, hugs and more
We'll I guess it didn't last
And your probably wondering
Why am I calling for
But I'm not calling anymore
Simple moments it is what it is
I'm over you then something just slips
Into vision, into my mind
We were good friends
So this happens to me everytime
I just hope you're good
Cause I have all my love to give
You just must not be the one
And I just got to live
So I'mma let it slip
All the hurt and the lies
And oh, how I comprimised
And you slid low, I already know
So I'mma do us a favour
And just let it go

Put Me Through It...

Feenin' For Your Love
Your In Every Thought
Who Woulda Knew
If I Let It Drop
You Would Make It Hot
Don't Stop
Thinkin' Of You
Though You Gone
Warm Arms
No Feelings
But They Coming
On Strong
Whats Wrong
Play The Song
Let Me Fall
Asleep & Dream
About Whats Not Wrong
With My Life These Days
Calling You at 2 am
& Random Times During The Day
So Many Items On The Menu
Thinkin'
I Shouldn't Stay Too Long In This Venue
Even After Your Gone
If Another Girl Asks
I'd Recommend You
What Did You Put Me Through
My Body Can't Deny
How I Feel Inside
Restless, Moving Side To Side
Wondering, How The Fuck..
Could Never Tell A Next Bitch..
Like What The Fuck...
They Could Find Out For Themselves..
I Be Laying There Thinkin' To Myself
After You're Gone..
Damn, What The Fuck...
He Put Me Through It...

What You Need:

I know you gotta fetish
Those eyes they wander
They embrace beauty at its finest
Damn, I'm mindless
If only you could see
What you mean to be
She's what you want
But I'm what you need
What a world we live in
I'll just let it be
Wishing you could hold me
Refraining from being selfish
& To No One I Can Tell This
How I Really Feel Inside
So I Keep It Closed Down
But They Already Know
That I Stay High Off The Indo
Lookin' Out My Window
Wishin' It Was You Pullin' Up
Ready To Resign Cause If It Was You
I'd Sit Down, Sign The Line & Say "I Do..."

Random Thought #10000000143 ???

Something fresh
Alotta Respect
Detailed & Deep
Conversations
& As I Fall Asleep
I Wonder if You Think of Me
These Feeling I Have
I Hope It's Not Bad
If I Let You Know
About Them You Know What I Mean
Let Me Show You
What it Really Means
If You Know What I Mean...

I Won't Let Them Media-Takeout Me...

We all doing things without thinking
Thinking It's Making Us Happy
Then I see You With You Lady In The Club
& I Remember back in the day
When I wanted to have yo baby
So in love but so sad
The way this girl moves
Its too bad I had to loose you
Now you have it all
Probably think of me seldom
Back against the wall
Last dollar to my name
Spent on the ttc to work
Most likely but you had
A job since time
Rich for life you just might be
If not now then very soon
And the memories loom
Though you helped me
You cause some pain
Things will just never
Be the same I was
so Innocent with you
and I feel like you
Broke me, maybe I
Broke myself for you
Opened myself for you
And it hurt, to see
Things I had never
really seen. Is that
on you or is that on me.
Had the chance but you
know me when it comes to logic.
Maybe it's just better this way
Because when people change for
The better nobody can stop it.
1 Love...

Waves

Listening to Frank Ocean, too distracted...
Can't write.... =)

Wassup Thoughts...

Give me a place to express myself
Whether they feel me or not
So many decisions to make
Gotta make the right ones
So many feelings I feel
Gotta decipher which ones real
Tellin the truth slippin up
Memories make me tell em
But I told em what can I say
Why do you make me feel this way
I wanna live a good life
Do things that make me feel good
I wonder if you ever think of me
I know I think you should
I wonder what it would be like
To conversate deep with you
On several subjects
Life is rough
But when I'm with you
I Love It..

Instrumental: I don't know how I should be feeling in this sily mess I made, but if it's true, would I have been so easily forgotten.

I think about my past & I'm grateful for what I have I brush off my bad thoughts even though I'm still mad My moms worked 3 jobs to make up for my dad She raised me as a single mother no sisters no brothers I grew up and observed other peoples lives wondering why everyday I go home and see pain in my mothers eyes I woke up one day and God took me by surprise I want to tell the truth Dear lord no more lies I never excelled in school It was tuffaz Instead I loved to daydream like I was still tucked into my covers About how one day we would be living good.

2007

Untitled

There's this dude that I know
Oh yes, I love him so
But fuck - he'll never know
How much I love him
I can't loose him
Gotta stop
Don't want to
Abuse him
He will never know
How much I love him

- April 4th 2007